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Talking to My Mom?

I have a problem. I feel like if I need to open up to my mom but she will get mad at how I feel because everything I say.

HELP,
Kristal from Miami

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June 7, 20060 found this helpful

Don't be afraid to talk to your mom hun. Even if she gets upset, I think most mom's appreciate it when their kids trust them enough to be open and honest. She may get frustrated and not always say/do things right..but she loves you..remember that!

Hang in there
Monica

 
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

Hi, I have a teenaged daughter. One suggestion is to write your feelings to your mom in a letter. This gives you a chance to get things off your chest without emotional reactions getting in the way, and your mom a chance to think about what you have said without having to come up with an immediate response.

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She will also know that this is important to you- you took the time to think about it and write it down. Hope this helps!

 
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

I agree that writing it down would be a good idea. SusannL said it perfectly!

You could also include things you're grateful to her for, so that she knows that she is appreciated as well.

 
By Ruth - Grandma of 10 great grandkids (Guest Post)
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

If you don't talk to your mom how is she to know your feelings and thoughts? I raised two daughters and even though I did not always agree with what they said, telling me stuff they were concerned about helped us to have a better relationship.

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You go, girl - I am 'pulling" for you!

 
By Sheri Darling (Guest Post)
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

Please be honest with your Mom. Maybe it will be easier to write down what you need to say. My daughter did that for several years. I would find the note when I got to work, then I would have time to collect my thoughts and really give an appropriate answer. Do not under estimate your Mom, the love of a Mother is boundless!

 
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

I agree that sometimes writing out your feelings is easier - whether you leave it for her to read or whether you use the letter as a springboard to talk to your mom. Talking face to face is almost always better though, so if you do, be respectful and be honest with her about your fears - just start by saying something like "Mom, I need to talk with you about something but first, I have to have your word that you will listen to what I have to say and not interrupt me. I need to know that I can say what I have to say without you losing your temper and getting angry with me." Then, just take a deep breath and say whatever it is you have to say. I sense that you may have something to tell her that you feel she is going to be upset with you about.

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That may well be the case, as a parent I can tell you that our fears often play out as anger. Mothers love their kids and want the best for them and it is only natural to react to anything that goes against those feelings. I think if you're open about your own fears and your need for your mom to fully hear you out right up front, it may be easier for her to keep her own emotions in check and give you time to get it all out. The bottom line is that no matter how bad you think what you have to say is, it is always better to be up front and honest with your mom from the very beginning. Don't keep it in and let it fester and eat away at you.

 
By Margaret (Guest Post)
June 7, 20060 found this helpful

How old are you and how do you know how your mom feels, My Daughter was the same way but she found out she was wrong and now she comes and talkes to me all the time my sons as well if your mom gets mad she might have a reason to do so but she will get over it and best of all BE HONEST with her i give the same advice to my Granddaughtes and its up to them if they wont to take it But good luck to you

 
By carla bledsoe (Guest Post)
June 8, 20060 found this helpful

its better to try and fail than not try at all. you have at least a 50/50 chance she'll hear you. part of growing up, painful as it can sometimes be, is learning how to make yourself heard. i know this sounds like homework, but there are books on how to talk to adults and family.

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ask at the library or a school counselor. there are good ideas like writing yourself a list of what you want to say. or how to word a letter to get the best results. you know your mom better than any book so you take the best ideas and put them to work for you. good luck.

 
By Julia in UK (Guest Post)
June 8, 20060 found this helpful

Hi, if you are not sure about your Mom how about talking to another relative first (your Grandma or your aunt or Dad).

I can still remember how much my Mom told me off when I confided in her when I was a teenager, and I am 50 now.

 

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