Where we live, the wind blows pretty much non-stop, and we just try to keep fetching things off the fences and returning them to the neighbors. One thing that didn't survive well was the electric smoker. Or the second one. Or the third one.
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Doubt if I will ever build a smoker (although I love smoked food) but got such a laugh from your style of writing! You tell it like it is don't you? LOL
Anyone making one of these should be aware not to use an old shelf rack from a refrigerator. The coating can become a poisionous substance when in the flames.
People have DIED using old refrigerator racks? I find that difficult to believe. Even if they were coated in a rubber or plastic the taste of the meat would be too putrid to even want to eat.
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