When I was 3 months old my father left my mother to fend for herself and the new born, me. He told my mother he was going back to the state he was born in to go help my great grandmother with my great grandfather because he had fallen ill. A few weeks passed and my mother finally got the nerve to call my grandmother due to the fact my mother had never met any of my father's family because they all lived in different states. His dad lived in Florida, his mom in Illinois, and his grandparents were there too.
Anyways when she called, his grandmother said no her husband was fine and he had never came to her house. My mother tried to find him using his Social Security number, but failed. 15 years later I'm finally old enough to know what is going on. Now she says she doesn't know what this social security number is or anything. I found a old birthday card he sent when I was two, with an old PO box number on it.
She doesn't remember most things when I ask her, like what did he look like. I have a feeling she isn't telling everything to me and my mother doesn't keep things from me.
He's done this once before. I have an older sister by him whom I have never met either. All I know is his name. If you have any ideas on how to find him please let me know.
Thank you it would mean the world to me if I could meet my father at least once before I turn 18, but it would be nicer if I could before 16. :)
By <3hollywoodundead<3 from Akron, OH
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I don't think it is possible to locate anyone by the SS#. You can try to 'google' his name, to see if you can find any thing, but if he has a common name, you may spend much time looking.
You can also try the Salvation Army. They do help find missing relatives, usually if the person you are looking for is homeless, but they do try.
Just go to their site, and there is a link. You will have to provide some info.
I don't know your situation, but don't let this make you upset--sometimes you never know why people do or don't do things.
And don't feel badly towards your mom. There may be things she herself is not ready to admit, even to herself, about your dad, and may feel that you are not old enough or mature enough to handle it.
I hope that you do find what you are looking for. But if you are disappointed in what you find, or unsuccessful, just keep on being the person that you are, and don't let that situation define you.
God Bless you, and good luck to you!
Well actually, you are entitled to support from this man and if you petition the courts with his SS number for that support they may find him. Understand even at your young age that this man is missing something in characture if he would abandon his two children, and you may not like what you find if you do locate him. Sometimes these reunions work out. Sometimes the person who gets found turns out to be a leach and can't be got rid of and causes all kinds of trouble.
Try genforum, a genealogy site that helps in finding family members, alive and not. You can google search by typing genforum and your last name.
Hey, I get where your coming from. I hope you find what you are looking for. I was in a similar situation, I was 5 years old.
I wasted 20 years of my life. Sometimes just overly thinking about it, crying about it etc. Fathers day was always sad for me.
Long story short, I am who I am today because of what I've been through. I have 2 kids who I vowed never to abandon, I'm a great father, because I know how much I missed mine in my life.
Point is, I feel like I could have lived a better childhood had I just focused on living instead of dwelling in the past. Looking back at it all, I regret wasting so much energy on something that I had no control over.
I'm not saying you shouldn't try to find him, I found mine in my 20's. But it doesn't change what happened. Nothing will ever stop me from being apart of my kids life.
Focus on you, be the best you can be. Finish school and make your own family. :)
good luck and God Bless.
www.zabasearch.com is the website I have used often doing genealogy. IF you cannot locate your father's name, perhaps one of his kin still living in the state where your parents once resided. I would enter that state, county and make contact to inquire of your dad's name being known to them. It's a starting place. Also, try searching on www.findagrave.com which provides details of state, county and surnames in the location last known. While some people may have moved elsewhere with that surname, doesn't mean they all have. You may find yourself with a connection to the next step forward. Good Luck and all these websites provided are FREE.
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