13 Golden Rules on Being a Guest

An amicable guest is as important as being a very gracious host. I enjoy having guests at our house. Since we live in one of the five boroughs of New York City, we have had many guests (family and friends) of different characters and personalities. Most of them have made themselves at home and enjoyed their stay while visiting the city. This in turn always made us feel happy that they were our guest. I like to help our guests to plan their sightseeing and provide all the comforts necessary. My experience as a host has made me aware on what I should do as a guest.

Not all our guests make themselves desirable. I feel that being a guest is an art that is forgotten and needs to be polished. Here are some guest etiquette tips that I am sure will be useful to make the host and the guest all smiles:

Inquire if your host can host your visit before you make travel arrangements.
Communicate and keep your host informed about your date and time of arrival, length of your stay, and how many members will be visiting.
Always inform your host if you have diet restrictions, food preferences, and any other specific requirements that need to be arranged.
If you are traveling with children and need particular gear like car seats or high chairs, please request early so that it can be arranged.
When you arrive, please make sure to put your luggage in the provided place.
Inquire if you can wear outdoor shoes indoors.
Feed your children before you eat, so as not to waste food. Take care of their needs before you relax and socialize. Make sure they respect the host's house.
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Please do not leave a mess or your belongings in the bathroom, do not leave wet towels on the bed, do not leave the lights on, do not abuse the use of television, radio, and other electronics, and do not leave empty coffee cups and plates around the house. The host's house is not a hotel and nor is the host a housekeeper.
Inform the host if you are going to return late from your sightseeing. Also, inform if you are going to have dinner at home or outside. The host will prepare dinner accordingly.
Please do not hang around the kitchen while the host is preparing food or stand too close to distract the host. Help if you can and the host permits. (I personally do not like to socialize with guests while I prepare food. I cannot concentrate).
If you need any assistance please speak up, the host is not a mind reader.
If you cannot bring them an appropriate gift, observe what they may like during your visit so that you can buy appropriate gift before you leave.
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Most important do not forget to thank the host for their hospitality upon arriving home. The host wants to make you feel at home during your visit, therefore treat their house like yours and not like a hotel. Also remember, you may become a host someday.

By Raji from E. Elmhurst, NY

A sign in front of a house welcoming friends to visit.

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(Guest)
Gold Post Medal for All Time! 846 Posts

May 11, 20111 found this helpful

Rule 14. When someone is gracious and shares their home with you, which adds expenses of assorted utility costs, don't assume they can also afford the food they feed you and that they can afford to be your free taxi service. Even hotels charge for food and for transportation beyond the ride to and from the airport. You're already saving money for each nights stay so please be thoughtful and pitch in financially.

Linda

May 13, 20110 found this helpful

15. Respect your host's lifestyle. You are a guest in someone's home not at a hotel convention or the office. Respect the home owner's beliefs and customs the same as you would expect in your own home. If they are vegan, you will be vegan during your visit or eat out. If they are non-smokers you could ask about a smoking area outside but be sure to dispose of the butts in a responsible way and remember they stink to nonsmokers so double wrap them. Announcing that saving aluminum cans is silly or that separating recyclables is a waste of your valuable time is just plain rude.

If your hosts recycle then you recycle. Anything less would be disrespectful.

16. Many guests go to shows and "tourist" type events that run very late in the evening while their hosts usually have to get up early and go to work. If you will be out late it would be nice to ask about a key so you can return quietly and not wake them.

Cheryl

December 14, 20150 found this helpful

Respect the pets of your host. Whether you like the pet or not, act and speak kindly of it. Respect if the pet is to be allowed in or out, leashed, etc.

Catherine
Bronze Feedback Medal for All Time! 131 Feedbacks

December 20, 20210 found this helpful

Staying with hosts which culture you know well should be easy but be careful. In every country, the rules always come round food and gifts, but the problem is that the rules are not the same everywhere sometimes they even are opposite. There are cultures and countries where coming with food or drinks as gifts for your hosts is a bad idea. In the culture of your host, it could mean : Are they coming with food because they fear not to be given enough ? Traditions are changing among youth with the melting of cultures but still, for example in Spain, it is not a good idea to say, in the middle of the meal that the food you are given is Oooooh ! So delicious ! Again your host interpretation of your "ecstasy" could be : Is it such a surprise ? Is it a relief ? Have I the reputation to be such a bad cook ? Make a little inquiry first, to find out what is done and what isn't.

Here in my country it is the opposite, your opinion about the food and the wine you are being served is compulsory ! Especially if you want to be given more... The rules for the guests go like this : Ask your hosts what time would be the most convenient for your arrival and unless you are completely disabled, do not ask your host to pick you up at the airport or the train station. Coming on your own, will be the occasion to buy fresh flowers to offer your hosts. When you buy the flowers try to anticipate, if you are not sure your hosts have an appropriate vase to put flowers in then buy a potted plant in blossom because it is a bit embarrassing to create a problem with your big bouquet if there is no other place left to put it but the sink or the bath. So ! No empty hands when ringing the bell ! Flowers always and one or more good bottles of wine depending on how many days you will stay. If there is a specialty in your place, it is also a good gift to bring. But before ringing the bell and offering the gifts, take care to never arrive pinpoint on time, always be 5 to 10 minutes late. It is a very important rule, it tells your hosts that you do not consider them as your servants having to strictly respect time, on the contrary it proves that you are aware of all the cares your hosts are taking to prepare the house and the food, to welcome you well. Your hosts will appreciate (the 5 minutes late rule is used even for professional appointments). If you come for a few days of visit of your hosts town, you will be expected to invite your hosts to a restaurant at least once, generally on your last evening in town. During the week try to make them talk about their favorite places in town to choose the right restaurant to invite them to.

During your days of visit of the town, it is also nice to come back at your host's place with little gifts or some nice food you bought to share with them. About slippers of course you do not come with slippers for just a dinner but for a week stay you do bring your own. Hope this will help in case of an invitation to visit a French town staying at a welcoming french family.

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