How can you wean a 2 1/2 yr. old off the pacifier when you have tried everything that you can think of?
Dawn from Jay, Maine
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Out of sight is out of mind.
Have the patience to handle the tantrums and Good Luck.
Maybe you can replace the pacifier with a "special blanket". Kids love theatrical dramatization. Make a big show of "finding " the blanket and attach a note from the "Tooth Fairy" who is concerned about her growing teeth. Tell the child it has been replaced by something that won't hurt her smile.
I know, this seems dishonest or caddy, but do you really want to shell out the dough for braces?
Just so you know there is a light at the end of the tunnel - I sucked my thumb until I was nine (I'm 57 now), my two friends sucked their thumbs until they were twelve (they are older than me), lol. Our teeth are great and we are normally adjusted. My daughter was four when she stopped and her teeth are good, too. We were all very lucky and I only wrote so that you could know bad things don't always happen and we do grow up adjusting to losing our habit. Thank you for writing :)
I would limit its use to bed, and stand up to that. (If she wants it during the day, she needs to sit on the bed.)
There are a lot of developmental/neurological
arguments for use of the pacifyer, and a number of behavioral (and a few dental) ones against its use.
Personally, if she is willing to limit its use to her bed, I am not sure it is worth the conflict to stop it. As for the teeth....most kids end up with braces, paci. or not, it seems. Both mine needed the braces and neither used a paci.
My daughter limited my granddaughter to using the pacifier only in bed at night, for her nap, or in the car seat. She got to the point she would ask to go to bed to be with her pacifiers. She had 5 of them lined up there. She would automatically throw the pacifier onto the bed when she got up. It worked very well and it wasn't long until she didn't care about it at all. They are very consistent with everything they do with her and it really works well. I can see that she learns well this way and isn't 4 yet, but is already learning to play the violin. I am a very proud grandma!
Drugstores sell a product called THUM (or some similar name), a liquid you put on kids thumbs that has a nasty taste. Put it on the pacifier. It may take a few tries and maybe even a few pacifiers before the child is convinced but just keep using it and the kid will stop.
I was afraid I'd have to pack it in her lunch-pail when she went off to kindergarten but hubby and she made a deal and they threw it off a boat we were on (those were the days we did not think twice about throwing things overboard) but she had made her decision and it was final. She's 25 now and I still have one I kept, just in case. LOL!
My daughter was addicted to her pacifier, she even had problems with speech because it was constantly in her mouth. We tried everything and finally bribary worked. She loved to color, so I got her a big shiny box of 64 Crayolas and told her she could have it if she stopped using the pacifier, as only big girls could use crayons. She threw away the pacifier and never asked for it again. She still loves to draw and she's 9 now.
I would suggest maybe replacing the pacifier with a lollipop to soothe the missing of the pacifier. Or offer an incentive ( aka the sucker ) if he/she goes certain time without.
cut the nipple off of the paci and give them the plastic part to hold , sleep with whatever they need, its going to take a few days but it works, my daughter and nephew were so hooked that they had them 24/7 if I let them, so cutting off the end really works, try it , it couldn't hurt
We also cut just a tiny bit off the end of the pacifier. Our daughter still carried it around but she didn't suck it as much cuz it didn't "feel right." Finally she just left them lay! My sister's child also had alot of problem with that ... they put them in a baggie and went to the store and "traded" them for a new swingset (prearranged of course with the clerk, etc.!).
I had two thumbsuckers, so that is a different "weaning" experience. However, my best friend had paci users. With her son, they had gone out in their motor home and left the paci at home. He went all day without it, yes, there were tears, etc. But, my friend decided that if they went through the worst trama, they could just continue...so once they got home, her hubby got out of the motor home and swept the house clean of all pacis. Her son was about 3 at the time. Her younger daughter was about 2 1/2 when Easter rolled around. They made a big production of gathering all the pacis for the Easter Bunny to take back to all the baby bunnies. With him leaving some Easter goodies, it was a positive sort of thing to be a big girl and give all the pacis to the baby bunnies. Good luck!
I recently read a story about a family that tied it to a balloon and sent it off to the pacifier fairy. The fairy, in turn, brought a new fancy toothbrush and kid paste. telling a child that in 5 days, they will be gone and reminding daily then STICKING to it can help.
I had the exact problem as you have. When my child was 2 years old, I gathered up all the pacifiers & threw them all away. I told my son they all were lost & after a couple of days they were never mentioned again! Worked great for me.
At that age, they understand alot more than you give credit. Besides the obvious of wearing braces down the road, just say you are 2 1/2, some things are for babies, this is one. You are a big girl/boy and we want to be able to do big B/G things. We can't with the plug.
We can play outside on the swing or sit here with the plug in the mouth. EtC. Make it their choice to throw it away. And a permanent one of taking it to the outdoor trash barrel. It is done.
My 2 1/2 yr granddaughter rationalized to me the other day why she got her shot of antibiotic at the clinic. I was sick and it hurt. The shot hurt for a little while grandma, but not no more. And I feel better. So it is o.k.
They are not stupid, how do you think they learn to manipulate us so easy?
Granddaughter said to me, I peed the bed, grandma, like a baby. But I am not a baby. I had an accident. So she helped me change the bed. She has been wearing panties since 18 months. Uses the bathrooms on her own (supervised). Gave her potty chair away "cause she was not a baby anymore." Move from one comfort zone to another.
My kids/grandchildren never used pacifiers. I did daycare, and very seldom did the child need the pacifier. It was their contact from home. Find something else that can be near and dear.
It is more the parent not knowing what to do. Better start making judgement calls now, it doesn't get easier. Get back to me when you need working advice for teens--setting boundary and rules is what they want. Easier to tell friends MY MOM WON"T LET ME, rather than them saying NO I DON"T WANT TO.
The post by ace was mostly like what I did, only I did it at age 1-1/2. When they are under 2, it is easy to get them to go along. What I did is when they took their nap or what ever, I went around & found every pacifier in the house & threw them out. For a few days before, I went around checking everywhere, to make sure I had them all, you do not what them finding one at some point. Then when they wanted it later, I helped them look for them (we looked everywhere) & when we couldn't find any. I shrugged & told them we couldn't find any & they just accepted that they were gone & no one knew why. It just was they are very trusting & mama looked. I am not a fan of lying to my kids, I always tried to tell them the truth so they could understand, but this saves lot of anguish & hurt on their part.
They seem to accept things easily when they r really young, & doing it this way, there was never any crying or tantrums what so ever. My daughter left her son with his till he was almost 3 & he has very buck teeth now. It's mostly for comfort when they are young & as they get older, they don't need it as much, but it's a habit, like anything else.
At that age, they understand alot more than you give credit. Besides the obvious of wearing braces down the road, just say you are 2 1/2, some things are for babies, this is one. You are a big girl/boy and we want to be able to do big B/G things. We can't with the plug.
We can play outside on the swing or sit here with the plug in the mouth. EtC. Make it their choice to throw it away. And a permanent one of taking it to the outdoor trash barrel. It is done.
My 2 1/2 yr granddaughter rationalized to me the other day why she got her shot of antibiotic at the clinic. I was sick and it hurt. The shot hurt for a little while grandma, but not no more. And I feel better. So it is o.k.
They are not stupid, how do you think they learn to manipulate us so easy?
Granddaughter said to me, I peed the bed, grandma, like a baby. But I am not a baby. I had an accident. So she helped me change the bed. She has been wearing panties since 18 months. Uses the bathrooms on her own (supervised). Gave her potty chair away "cause she was not a baby anymore." Move from one comfort zone to another.
My kids/grandchildren never used pacifiers. I did daycare, and very seldom did the child need the pacifier. It was their contact from home. Find something else that can be near and dear.
It is more the parent not knowing what to do. Better start making judgement calls now, it doesn't get easier. Get back to me when you need working advice for teens--setting boundary and rules is what they want. Easier to tell friends MY MOM WON"T LET ME, rather than them saying NO I DON"T WANT TO.
What worked for us with my oldest son (Who was severelly addicted to his pacy) was that I quit using the pacy holders and got rid of all but one pacy and I made it his responsibility to keep up with that one. I told him that he could have his pacy, but if he wanted it, he had to know where it was and he had to get it when he wanted it, etc. It didn't take long before that lost it's apeal and he quit on his own. Good luck.
My youngest daughter is developmentally disabled and when she was about 16 months old she was real good, if I handed her something and told her to throw it away that is what she did. So one morning I handed her the pacifier and told her to throw it away, which she did. When it was nap time she fussed for awhile and I gave her one little swat on the butt and told her to lay down and go to sleep, which she did. There were no problems after that. Of course at 14 months she voluntarily gave up her bottle, so maybe she was just easy to get to do things like that. Potty training was another completely different experience. lol
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How do I get my 19 month old daughter off the pacifier? Any ideas would help!
Thanks,
Misti from Carthage Tennessee
My daughter was able to throw hers in the garbage, we took a picture of her actually, she was really proud of the picture. I have also heard that if you cut the tip of it, in tiny clips, day by day do this, until eventually there will be nothing left for her to suck on. We never tried this but it may work. Good luck! (01/18/2006)
By Julie
Misti,
My kids are thumb suckers, not pacifier users, but I've heard that by poking a hole in the "sucking" end of the pacifier and releasing the air out works. This supposedly takes the cushion out of the pacifier which then makes it not so pleasurable. Don't know if it will work, but it's worth a try.
(01/18/2006)
By Trudy Powell
My little girl actually went to visit a dentist with her brother. The dentist just glanced at her teeth and told her that she would end up needing braces. Two days later she said was a big girl and didn't need them anymore. She wanted us to wrap them up and give them to Santa to "take for another little baby boy or girl." To this day, she hasn't wanted one anymore. (01/18/2006)
By Brenda
My husband and I went away for the weekend and had packed the pacifier in our toddler's bag. We told the babysitter where it was but she never used it. That's how our daughter was broken. (01/18/2006)
I had 2 pacifier users. For both, I started restricting pacifier to bed only, night and naps. After a month or two, I cut a hole in the pacifier. With child #2, she tried sucking it, didn't like it & gave it up in 2 days. With child #3 she didn't seem to mind the hole at all and kept putting it in her mouth but w/ the sucking action gone, I was able to take it away in a week or so. (01/18/2006)
By Nancy
P.S. I didn't try to take the pacifier away from mine until they were 2.5/3 years old (so I guess I kept it to bed only for awhile longer than a few months). I didn't want to stress them out even more during potty training. (01/18/2006)
By Nancy
My son was totally addicted to his pacifier. He took it everywhere! At 18 months we switched daycare from a woman's home to a daycare center. They didn't want to mess with keeping track of his pacifier (& for sanitary reasons) so they asked us to wean him from it. They gave us a month to get it done. We let him take it to daycare the first week, then we asked him to leave it in the car the second week so it would be there for him when we picked him up. The third week we asked him to leave it on the dining room table by the front door. The fourth week we asked him to leave it in his bed and only use it at night. It made the big break much easier because his "use" time was drastically reduced. (01/18/2006)
By Cheryl from Missouri
We waited until the children had a cold. It is hard to suck at that time so giving it up is much easier.
Love & Prayers,
Linda (01/18/2006)
By Linda Howe
Have her watch Peter Pan. Then when the pacifier is laying around and she doesn't see, take the pacifier away. Maybe after she is sleeping. Later explain that the Lost Boys were crying for their mommies and Peter Pan went looking for pacifiers, and that now the lost boys have pacifiers and are happy now. This worked for my 4 year old. It also works well for balloons that get away, they go to Neverland. You can make up stories about the mermaids and pirates enjoying all these lost items and they can imagine it too. Good Luck! (04/16/2007)
By trista E
All the above suggestions work on children not of the stubborn variety. I have two grandchildren that sucked on pacifiers even with holes in them. So with my son's permission, I took an old one and placed a tiny drop of hot sauce on the tip every time they screamed for it. Yes the hot sauce upset them more. But they did eventually not want the binkies anymore. They eventually were scared of the burning and threw them in the trash themselves. (04/05/2008)
By mean grandmama
As soon as both my children got their first tooth I threw their pacifiers away...end of story. I didn't give in to the crying and eventually they stopped. As the parent you have to make up your mind that you are going to win that battle and not give in to them. For me it was easy because I didn't want to deal with the dental bills. Plus when they are young it seems to be over quicker than for people I have known that waited until they were older. Be strong, you are the parent after all. Good luck! (02/03/2009)
By lalala...